tapedave

I guess I keep trying to craft my writing to impress the editors of The New Yorker with my overinflated and slightly honest, though understandably involved, and supposedly not-ready-for-prime-time non-fiction, writings. Some—friends mostly—have noted they have the attention span of a butterfly, clocking in at under a minute per read session. Can I send them a skinnier, condensed version? How they know what a butterfly understands and how short their attention span can be is beyond me, or perhaps I have not smoked enough of the stuff formerly known as Mary Jane, the evil weed?

For those, I churned the full-on, full-fat text of the Do “The Hustle”… post into ChatGPT and asked OpenAi to make the blog post buttery smooth for those who don’t have the time to spend trying to decipher my humor and understand the sales messaging I subtly sprinkled in so as not to appear needy and wanting.

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We’ve all seen those TikTokers boasting side hustles that supposedly earn hundreds of dollars per hour. Most of the time, their hustle is you watching their videos. But it got me thinking—I already have something to sell: books!

Look out! Marketing schmutz below!

My book Mud Folio is a collection of unsung lyrics—poetry with a musical twist. It’s earned praise from notable figures like jazz singer Ann Hampton Callaway, pianist Ramsey Lewis, and Gang of Four drummer Hugo Burnham. The latest edition features 30 new lyricals, perfect for composers seeking inspiration or a new lyricist to collaborate with.

The blurbettes are on Amazon and Barnes & Noble, and I think you can even buy the softcover (on the left above) and the hardcover (on the right) on Walmart.com, though not in the stores. 

Buy yours today! (Jump through the links below to also read the fantabulous and copious marketing verbiage before ChatGPT homogenized it.)

Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Walmart | Boston Globe Feature for the first edition in 2013

And in the esoterica department?

Inspired by our high school campaign to elect a mannequin as class president, Don’t Be A Dummy is primarily blank pages with room for your own musings. This tongue-in-cheek coffee table book has “endorsements” from personalities like Eddie Murphy and Eddie Izzard.

Get your copy today!

(Again, those obviously fictional blurbettes can be found through the first two links below. Walmart has very little marketing schmutz online. This is perhaps just one reason books don’t sell well there unless they are best-sellers, cozy murder mysteries, by a Kardashian, or religiously themed.)

Amazon | Barnes &  Noble | Walmart |

And slightly a bit more practical?

A humorous nod to Mao’s Little Red Book, this lined notebook is perfect for notes, doodles, or starting your own revolution. A favorite among my old classmates! (How ChatGPT hallucinated that I have no idea. As the text below was shoved into the machine and I clearly state how many I have sold to date.)

Here’s the postcard I created to hand out at our recent High School reunion, hoping to boost sales. I believe I have sold two so far. So it’s up to you to raise that total to the height of the Great Wall.

Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Google Books |

More to come?

Got a manuscript or some wild ideas? Let’s make it a book. Contact me and watch this space for future releases.

And for the uninitiated, the title? The Hustle is a nod to the iconic disco hit. Here’s a clue from YouTube.

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(And ChatGPT praised itself on its work, with the addition of an exclamation point to drive home its fine ability to churn and skim the full-fat text: “How’s that? Short, focused, and still keeps your humor intact!”)